Apollo 18

OK, so I’ll say straight up, Apollo 18 isn’t the absolute worst film you’ll ever see. Close, but not the worst. Some of it is actually quite interesting. I liked the premise, for instance – which is that the reason for the termination of the lunar missions was less to do with budget cuts that it was hostile aliens. More pertinently for this particular movie, it also claims that after Apollo 17, a single final mission – Apollo 18 – was sent to the Moon’s surface in 1974 where it encountered something brutal and scary and deadly amongst the rocks. According to the filmmakers, the video images of the inter-planteary encounter were then rescued and edited into this movie. Yeah, whatever.

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In spite of the best efforts of the two actors, in spite of a really effective sound design of clanks and groans, and some decent, spooky security camera lighting, and even some chilly alien SFX, it just doesn’t really raise the stakes to anything more than a couple of grown men in socks stuck in a portaloo at night.