I really enjoyed the first Expendables movie; I thought it hit lots of right notes on the scale between kitsch and entertaining. Expendables 2 though, I thought was unwatchable. I stuck with it long enough for a villain called Vilain to put Liam Hemsworth down, and that facelifted old homophobe Chuck Norris to do some stuff, and that was it for me. I gave up before Schwarzenegger appeared, which was probably a good thing because he’s tiresomely self-absorbed too.

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Expendables 2 partly filmed in Bulgaria, but witness the sheer arrogance of filmmakers when they get to play in developing countries: the production had to be fined for breaking the terms of its permits and filming explosions, car chases and fires in close proximity to Devetashka Caves. Devetashka is considered one of the most important bat habitats in Europe, home to 15 species of bats – but the sleeping bats were subjected to stress, loud noise from heavy machinery and construction works, bright projector lights and crowds of people which kept them awake during a period when they should have been hibernating. Thugs.