Just, no.

So as the horrible, horrible, excoriating reviews for Pan pour in, I am simply asking myself: Whatever was the perceived demand for this film to be made? It was a great script, apparently, but who made a call on audience demand? Who ever determined that there would be an army of a gazillion teenage boys (or whatever) clamouring to fill the seats of cinemas all over America, for this umpteenth retelling of a tale of Victorian whimsy? Nothing and no-one – that’s who. And then: why would they think anyone would be interested in a movie headlined by Hokey Hugh Jackman, a gentleman who has clearly and quite erroneously bought into his own hammy, bugging, self-referential schtick over the years. And: factor in the grievous error of a white Tiger Lily in 2015….

It doesn’t matter how good a film is, if there’s no audience for it, it’s not going to be a success. And when you’ve got a movie like Pan – where even the trailer is an overblown mess – then you’ve got the makings of a box office disaster….No, folks, this Peter Pan Origins movie was dead before it spent a dollar of it’s $150 million production budget.