Canadian movie The Colony is set in the year 2045, when climate change has decimated the planet and the survivors huddle from the new Ice Age in underground bunkers (or “colonies”). One day, (spoiler alert) the Colonists from Bunker 7 receive a distress signal from over at Bunker 5, and a small, mis-matched group heads out to investigate. When they find what the problem is, they come home again, and then they are attacked by cannibals and then those few who remain alive leave the Bunker altogether.

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So while it’s all well and good to see the Canadians playing the US at their own (low-budget, CGI gorefest) game, the point is, it is their game. All of the ideas here are poached from other tales you’ll have seen somewhere else American before. It’s not badly acted or anything. Locations are atmospheric too – it filmed on an abandoned NORAD base in Canada’s North Bay. It’s just the plot; it reminded me of nothing more than that old nursery rhyme about the Grand Old Duke of York and his ten thousand bored men – an exercise in futility.